Sleep Is For The Over Thirty

the sky is blue today, and there are clouds rolling by, slight wind, my windows cracked open, on my mind is nothing, well a fear that I am in to deep, to many things to do to much college, I felt bad last night for the first time wrong about going out, mom would not like that, Do i really like it? I had tons of fun I would say, but drinking adds a falseness and I hate falseness, it allows me to be bold out going say "fuck a lot" but while I think its fun, I don't want to do it anymore for two nights in a row.

Earlier I thought I heard a voice, the voice was so familiar to me of someone I knew, quite well and while it was familiar I couldn't remember who sounded like that. I thought I saw Claire walking the other day and I wanted to run up and say "Hey Bebe!" I am torn now, I don't want to be at home, I want to be here. I want to go out and stay out, I like that I am now in the swing of college drama play and violin lessons. But I am to busy. to large on life, do I need time? no sleep is for the over thirty. yes that is right.